I don’t want to live in that anger. It won’t fix anything.

I was all set to add my two cents worth about our current national political condition.  Suffice it to say, we are in trouble folks!  When our supposed leader can spit in the face of a judge and for the most part tell the judge his ruling doesn’t count, and a respected former governor can state his opinion against said leader and then be called on the carpet for it, not to mention all the other antics of this same supposed leader, we are in trouble.  BIG TROUBLE!
But that’s not what I want to write about today, well, at least not directly.  We all would like to know what the solution to this mess is that we are in.  To be honest, I don’t know if there is a solution, at least not one that would really make a difference? 

So what do we do then?  How do we survive the storm we are in?   We used to say the coming storm, but I think we are past that, the storm is upon us.  Is there anything we can do? 
Is there anything, ANYTHING, we can do that will really make any difference and get us out of this storm?  At least anything non-violent? 
I can’t speak anyone else, but here are my thoughts.   What I feel like I am being called to do is to support and encourage others.   I’m not by nature a *negative nelly*, to be honest I’ve been told I lean more toward the “little miss susie sunshine” side of things.  I’m not sticking my head in the sand and saying we’re not in trouble, as I’ve already said, we are in BIG TROUBLE!  But since there is nothing much I can do besides speaking as loudly as possible, then I need to follow what I believe I’ve been called to do. 
What do I mean by support and encourage?  I’m not sure yet.   That’s just be being honest with you, with myself.  All I know is I feel like I have a choice of three types of behaviours.  The last choice would be the anger, negative behaviours, which would not be helpful or healthy.  The second choice is neutral behaviours; washing dishes, driving to work, watching movies, etc.  Nothing wrong with these choices, and the 3rd choice can be implemented while performing them.
The 3RD and best choice, my focus for today, the positive behaviours. 

The smiling, supportive, helpful behaviours.  Smiling at someone who looks like they are in pain, even if I don’t know them and don’t speak to them, hold the door open for someone, compliment someone, just be nice, extra nice, as much as possible.  I wish I could say that would me 24/7, but come on, let’s be honest, no one can do that.  But I’ll try.   Why?  There’s a scripture that states “They Joy of YaHUaH is our strength” and *Heaven* knows I need His strength!!  So what brings Him joy?  Whatever would bring Him joy would be in the realm of the 3rd choice of behaviours.   Oh, to be sure, I’ll still be writing about our current political sorrow’s, part of our reality is that things things need to be brought into the light.  But for my every day life, I want to live, as much as possible in that 3rd realm of choices, the choices that bring Him joy and me strength and peace.  The choices that will help others be as positive and encouraged as possible in our current dilemma. 
I don’t even know for certain that this will be helpful to anyone other than myself.  But it’s what I’m going to do, to the best of my ability.  I’m still angry about what’s happening to our country, angry at those who are in charge and causing the harm to our country.   But I can’t live in that anger.   I don’t want to live in that anger.  It won’t fix anything. 
Anyway, that’s all I have for right now.  Thanks for letting me “think out loud” again!  

I am also sharing my blog @ RED NATION RADIO:

http://rednationradio.com/2015/02/22/dont-want-live-anger-wont-fix-anything/

And in the mean time…….

sometimes they just plain lie!

Someone recently asked me why I haven't turned on cable or satellite tv since I moved last year.   I asked her right back, "why?".   There is nothing on the news channels that I believe and what I want I can get from the internet, via facebook posts, websites, The Blaze, radio stations on my way to and from work, etc etc etc.   What was the one thing I said that astounded her?  "I don't believe the news channels".  This seemingly well educated acquaintance was dumbfounded to learn I don't trust our marvellous media!  She asked if I really believed they would lie to us?  What could I say but "yes".

I used to think they were just mislead (20+ years ago?), or perhaps misfed information?  But here I was trying to explain how our media guru's think nothing of twisting and turning facts to create their version of the truth, at least the "truth" they want us to believe.   And yes, sometimes they JUST PLAIN LIE. 

She asked "how do you know?"  I kid you not, the first thought that ran through my brain was "how do I explain to this rock that it's a rock?"  I did try to use some examples from our recent political history, but regardless of any words I had to offer, including "check it out for yourself, do a little homework" (which was apparently a serious insult?), I felt like I was just spitting in the wind, running in circles, talking to a wall???

Sadly, there are many people who think the media, the politicians, leaders, preachers, etc, could and would never lie to us.  I'm not saying they all do, but I will say we all need to do our homework, check things out for ourselves.   As a former military journalist who wrote mostly the "fluffy awards"  and "community PR" pieces" when I was enlisted, I will be the first one to say "don't believe everything you read!" 

It makes me sad that so many people out there are so gullible.  So asleep.  So deep in denial.  I pray (yes literally) that more of our citizens will wake up before it's too late, and I pray it's not already too late!  

Thanks for letting me "think out loud"

As this is my first post on Red Nation Radio, I say thank you for including me and I look forwarding to reading the opinions of others! 

allow myself to cry when I need to!

I was reading another blog just a few minutes ago & suddenly felt so connected to the writer.  http://ohsoshabbybydebbie.com/when-and-why-women-cry/ 

Here is my reply: Sometimes, I want to cry so bad, from anger, disappointment, just plain sadness & sorrow, and sometimes I don't know why.  I also don't know why I can't allow myself to cry.   I always tell myself I can't cry right now, I'm on my way to work, or I have to stop at my son's house, or I have to go shopping, or what if someone sees me.  And then when I am at home alone.  I want to cry, I need to cry.  I'm afraid to cry.   what if I cry and i can't stop.  Crying is a sign of weakness and I can't be weak.  or i'm just afraid to cry for whatever reason.   what if...........      So I don't allow myself to cry.

Then suddenly someone will say something or do something, at work, in a conversation, at the store, at a family gathering and suddenly the tears just flow as if I were a 2 year old child that just got spanked and they won't stop.  Sometimes they are very quiet tears, tears I try to hide but can't.  Sometimes they are great sobbing down to my core tears and I have to excuse myself. 

Maybe that should be my next self improvement project, learn how to allow myself to cry when I need to!   Like the rain clouds, I need to let it flow!

lessons to be learned......... I want to make more room & time for joy, peace, family and friends!

I haven't written much of anything for the last couple months.   After Mom went back home I started moving boxes & furniture out of my storage unit (where I've kept it for almost 7 years, that's another story for another day).  And at the same time I was just starting my new job.   So my days have been very full!!!  So is my house now!

As I began to move these boxes & some of the furniture, I would occasionally come upon a box that was opened or falling apart and I'd start going through it.    The amount of *stuff* I've already thrown away is disgusting (mostly because I've kept it for so long!).   

Anyway, back to the lessons I learned.  

As I transported boxes from the storage unit to my home I started feeling a bit "boxed in", and I ended up with boxes blocking my way into the extra bedroom, blocking my way to my computer, completely blocking my dining room!!! It's like a maze in my house!!!   

Obviously I've moved, sorted & thrown out a few boxes, at least enough to get my computer.  So I can finally get back to writing!  

First lesson learned?  Don't let your past be a block to living today.   I found mounds of papers, that I don't know why I kept them, my 7th grade report cards, fun to look at for a minute or two (especially fun for my grandkids), but then what do you do with it.  I've already given 3 or 4 boxes of clothes & toys & dishes & stuff away,  thrown out 5 or 6 large boxes of junk, and I feel like I've barely made a dent.

But at least I can get to my computer again.

Second lesson learned?  If it won't help you live today better, throw it out!  Yes, it's just that simple.   If it's not something valuable you want to leave to your children AND they would want it, throw it out!  If you don't have a specific place for it, besides back in a box, throw it out!  If it doesn't make you smile, throw it out!!!!   The only exception I make to that rule is books.  I don't throw out books!  NO, not even my college calculus book or my 200 year old German Bible that I bought at a yard sale for $20, both 35-40 years lessons to be learned.........  ago.  

Third lesson learned?  Don't let your boxes of your past get in the way of your future.  Yes, I have to go through each and every box, there are some important papers I'm looking for and I don't want to accidentally throw out any pictures or anything of actual value.  But I don't let it take over my daily life or plans for tomorrow.  I wish they were all out of my way now, but they aren't, all I can do is go through them one box at a time, when I have time.  Eventually they'll all be gone and I'll be left with a tidied up house, a  swept out past, a simplified home & daily life & an unencumbered future.   

Yes, I know it all sounds a bit simplistic.  And maybe it is.   But you know what?  I don't care, it's my plan, my house, my life.  I want to make more room and time for joy, peace, family and friends!  I want to be able to breathe free and not be constantly surrounded by boxes of my past! I want to have time to spend reading, writing & being in the presence of my Heavenly Creator Father!  

And if anyone has any answers as to why healthy eating is more costly, I'm all ears!

Just a quick question, and hopefully I'll get some real answers? 

Why is it that the healthier you try to eat, the more it costs you?  I'm not talking one of those fancy schmancy diets, just plain clean healthy eating.   Water instead of soda's, fruit instead of candy, grilled chicken or fish instead of big mac's, salad instead of fries or tator tots or mounds of deep fried onions with sauce, etc etc etc........

And it's not just the $$ that it costs.  If someone happens to notice you trying to eat healthier, especially if they aren't they are quite likely to **make comments**, "oh, are you trying one of those new fad diets?", or "Dr's don't know everything, I figure if it tastes good, eat it!   What's the worst that could happen?  It could kill you?  You're going to die anyway,  You might as well enjoy it while you can"  or "why bother? you look healthy enough to me."  or "what are you trying to do starve yourself to death?", or "what, you want to be one of those twiggy models?"  (knowing full well you'll never be a model, don't want to be one, but they know how to make it sting!)

I'm sure all of you could think of more examples, but you get my point.

I am trying to eat healthier, more protein, vegies & fruit, less carbs.  I also need to lose weight, but not to be a twig, because I'm too  heavy for height & age.  Yes, of course I know I need to exorcise more, and I'm working on it.

But my biggest struggle right now is that I'm on a squeaky tight budget and struggling with balancing between the budget & healthy eating.   I don't like to microwave my food any more than needed (tastes yucky and it's not good for you, in my opinion)  So I'm looking for options.  I'm getting bored with hard-boiled eggs, pieces of cheese, cucumbers, celery & green pepper raw or dipped in healthy salad dressing.   (pop corn, corn & peas are definitely out of the question, too high in simple carbs)

If any of you have any ideas, suggestions, recipe's, I hope you will share them in the comments? 

And if anyone has any answers as to why healthy eating is more costly, I'm all ears!