Yahuah lift up His face upon you and give you peace

I was going to write on my story blog tonight, but I feel the need to add something here instead.  I was in Walmart tonight getting some medicine for my allergies/cold, whatever this is.  I was not at all pleased with what I saw there.

As I was waiting in line, listening to bits and pieces of conversations, not eavesdropping just hearing the words of people as they passed by me, I saw very few smiles.  It was as if everyone had been commanded to be sad.  The very few times I did see someone smile, they were buying alcohol for their new years eve celebration, I assume.  I find that disturbing.  Why should they be the only ones allowed to smile?

Well, the answer is they're not!  We, His Children, the creation of our Creator, should have more reason to smile than any of them!  I'm not saying we're required to be happy and smiling ALL the time, but come on, let's get real, we have more reason to smile than anyone else on earth!  And yet, here was this whole store full of people wearing sadness as though it were their favorite garment to wear.  

My solution?  Well, it wasn't really my solution, it was Yahuah's, SMILE!!!  So that's what I did, as I left the store I made it a point to smile at people on purpose and tell them HAPPY NEW YEAR if they gave me any opportunity at all.  Yes, I got a few strange looks, but I left the store encouraged because I got more smiles in return than I got the strange looks.  

This is not the first time this has happened to me, and I doubt it will be the last.  But this time was different.  I've been feeling a bit *down* myself, due to some allergy/cold symptoms and some personal stress.  I was just kind of in limbo land, not happy, not sad, when Yahuah showed me the sadness that was settling on the other shoppers was the same thing trying to settle itself on me.    There was no sudden revelation, just a gentle nudge, just a knowing, I needed to smile & spread the smiles as much as I could.  And so I did.  

In these days where there is so much bad news, sometimes even pure wickedness, hatred, revenge, etc trying to take over our hearts and souls, our minds, our families, our country, we have to fight back.  I don't know that we can change the tide of wickedness, but we can change our response!    I'm not saying we should stick our heads in the sand and deny what is happening around us.   What I am saying is that we need to hold our heads up high and smile our way through it.  Smile, rest and trust in God.  Evil will happen, for a little while longer anyway.  BUT IN THE END THE VICTORY IS HIS AND OURS!!!!  that alone should give us reason to smile.   We will have those days when smiling is the last thing we want to do.  I don't deny that.  But we must smile, we must allow "the Joy of the Lord" to strengthen us, to permeate our beings!  

Yahuah, I pray You will strengthen us throughout this new year, throughout each new day.  Strengthen us and fill us with Your Joy and Peace that we would be able to share Your presence, Your Joy and Peace, with each other and with the world.  That through our smiles, Your Joy, You would call others unto Yourself!  And Yahuah, in those moments when I find myself not wanting, maybe even thinking I'm unable to smile, remind me of the words You spoke to me this night.  Remind me my smile is not just for me, but it's for Your purposes, for others.  and never let me forget what Your Word says in Jeremiah 29:11-13  "For I know the plans I am planning for you,' declares Yahuah, 'plans of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and expectancy.  Then you shall call on Me, and shall come and pray to Me, and I shall listen to you.  And you shall seek Me, and shall find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart."   I thank You Yahuah for wrapping your Love and Peace and Joy around me so much so that I just feel so much of Your Love right now!  

I could probably continue writing until midnight, but I don't want to bore anyone, so let me end this evening with this:

Numbers 6:24-26  "Yahuah bless you and guard you; Yahuah make His face shine upon you, and show favour to you;  Yahuah lift up His face upon you and give you peace"

ENJOY LIFE, DON'T JUST LIVE

the last monday of this year....   

I'm not one to have "new year resolutions"  I think we set ourselves up for failure when we do that.  

Should we work on ourselves to improve our lives?  Sure!  Should we have goals for ourselves?  Of course.

Should we set out a list of rules & "I want to be..." lists that are usually so ridiculous they are unattainable.  "I want to lose 110 pounds by May 1st",  "I want to be a millionaire by the end of June"  When you are working as a ceo of a multi-million dollar company you're already there.  when you work salary for another company, have bills & debts & just enough $$ to buy groceries, gas & maybe have a little fun once a month, maybe not so doable, realistically speaking that is.

No, I'm not into those kind of new year resolutions.  What I am into is learning more about my Creator, developing a closer relationship with Him.  Learning His truth, learning how to trust & rest in Him.  It's not one of those goals or resloutions I can set a date to achieve it by.  It's a goal I just keep striving for.   It's not even really a goal, it's the desire of my heart.   
What I am into is getting healthier and stronger.  It's not something I am going to write on a calendar or say something stupid like "I want to lose 5 pounds every week"  It's about changing my lifestyle to lose some more weight (yes, I do have a general amount that I need to lose, but nothing that will make me look like a stick), get more exercise, sleep better, eat healthier, drink more water, have more fun.  
And, one final thing is to make a more concentrated effort to let my family & friends know that I love them & they are more important to me than anything on this earth.  Again, not a goal you can write on a calendar or make a chart for.

I encourage you to ask Yahuah what He wants you to work on for the rest of your life.  Not for just one month or one year, but for the rest of your life.   All the things I just mentioned are always on my heart, always on my "to do" list.   

Do I set smaller specific goals to help me along the way?  Yes, like when I plan out my menu & grocery list, I try to always put healthier food items on the list.   When I get home from work I try to think of what I need to do around the house & make time to spend with Yahuah.   Whenever I get a chance I spend time with my family, in person, on the phone, video chat, etc.  

Before anyone thinks, "oh my, that sounds too good to be true", let me set you straight. It is.  Notice the word *try* in there?   Oh, I know, there's some quote out there that goes something like this "there is no try in success, there is only DO"  and to that I say, well bully for them!

I'm happy with trying, because every once in a while, I succeed.  But sometimes, I get home from work and I'm exhausted and for one reason or another, sometimes I just don't want to do ANY thing.  And sometimes when I'm getting groceries I just have this major longing for something CHOCOLATE!! what do I do about it?  Well, I buy some little chocolate bite of something and thoroughly enjoy it.  And yes, there are days (yesterday for example) when I just feel so crummy, all I want to do is stay home in my jammies with some hot tea & a good book.  GASP, THE HORROR!!!  hahahaha.  

So what am I saying?  GO TO YAHUAH & FIND OUT WHAT HE WANTS FOR YOUR LIFE, HOW DOES HE SEE YOU?  Do that.  Whatever it is you've had a desire for in your heart might be a hint.  I'm not saying it is, I'm not saying it isn't, but at least consider it, ask HIM about it?

But whatever you do, instead of making a bunch of silly little lists, that most likely we will fail to do most of them and then feel worse than before, decide what it is you want to do with your life, better yet what HE wants to do through you, through your life.  DO THAT!  At least try!!

Try, step by step, little by little, and maybe, yes maybe, sometimes in leaps, but at least try.  

No lists, no resolutions, let go of what you can't control, & enjoy life, don't just live.  Live and enjoy your life.  Don't let the fear of failure keep you from trying.

I was going to write on my story blog tonight, but I've run out of time.  I'll try to add some more tomorrow or 
Wednesday.  I don't know if I'll be back here tomorrow night, might be spending the evening with some of my friends.  I hope you have some fun, be safe and, in the mean time have a HAPPY & BLESSED NEW YEAR!!!! 

oooops! BUT HE LOVES ME ANYWAY!!

Some of you may have notice I had a post a few minutes ago and now it has been deleted.   That's because I was writing on my story and didn't realize I was on the wrong blog page.  I deleted it and posted it to the correct page at Lost Child Found Again.  

And now it's past my bed time.  But before I go I just want to say thank you to my readers.  Thank you for being patient and forgiving.   I'm just like everyone else, I make mistakes.  But guess what, our Heavenly Father, He loves me anyway.  In fact, He knew I was going to make these mistakes, sin, make dumb choices, before I was even conceived.  And He loves me anyway.  He loves you the same way. 

So tonight I go to sleep content in the soul deep knowledge that my Heavenly Father loves me more than I can possibly imagine and He desires His very best for me.  

Sorry, I can't keep my eyes open much longer.  Please, everyone be blessed and I'll chat again soon!

Blessings to all!   SHALOM!

Keeping the Sabbath. Working on it anyway.

Keeping the Sabbath.  Working on it.   Yes, I know some of you go to church on Sunday.  I occasionally attend a Sunday morning "service", I enjoy the worship & teaching where I go on Sunday mornings.  I also am a part of a small discussion group on Wednesdays, where I am learning a LOT!

But my current goal, my most important mission, if you will, is to learn more about & observe YAHUAH's Sabbath.  One of the problems I'm encountering is because I work all week, as I've mentioned before, sometimes 9 & 10 hour days.  I get home & I'm exhausted, more mentally & emotionally exhausted than physically exhausted.  So by the time the end of the work week gets here, my apartment is a MESS!

Do you know how difficult it is to relax into His Peace, to truly experience Shabbat Shalom, in the middle of a mess.  Soooooooo, I'm setting forth on 2 missions.  One to adjust my daily *routine* to keep my home from becoming such a disaster so that on Friday after work I can come home and pursue mission #2 *Shabbat Shalom*. 

And yes, I have a plan.  I'm going back to a system that has worked for me before, but when someone (who at the time was supposed to be one of the most important people in my life) made fun of me for using it, I quit.  But now  I don't care what that person thinks any more, they are no longer part of my life.  Anyway.......  I am going to go back to "FLYing".
 http://www.flylady.net/ is an awesome tool/system to use and very easy.  If you struggle with organizing & cleaning as I do, I encourage you to give it a try.
  
But my main mission is observing, learning about & from
YAHUAH's Sabbath in the way He desires us too observe His Sabbath. 

With that being said, let me end this post with what's in my heart.  

I wish you all  
     SHABBAT SHALOM!!

Emotions. We all have them.

So, first of all,  please let me apologize to my readers, whomever & where ever you are, for not posting earlier this week.  Working 9 & 10 hour days almost everyday for the last few weeks is getting old.   Correction, it's already old.  I'm so done with that nonsense.  But more on that later.

I just want to share one thing with everyone before I get started housecleaning.  (hold on, I need to go get another cup of coffee...),  ok, coffee refilled.  

Emotions.  We all have them.  Yahuah (most of you call him by the name God), created us in His image.  

Nehemiah 8:10 
 And Nehemiah continued, "Go and celebrate with a feast of rich foods and sweet drinks, and share gifts of food with people who have nothing prepared.  This is a sacred day before our Lord.   Don't be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!"

What did Nehemiah say?  "...for the joy of the Lord is your strength!"

When Yahuah entered the temple & saw it had  been made into a money changers pit (from hell?).   What did he do?  He became angry and threw over the tables & threw out the money changers & yelled at them!  

Emotions!

John 3:16
"For Yahuah so loved the world He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life."   

What did Yahuah do?  He LOVED us!  

Love is not just a verb, it's an emotion.  

Why am I talking about emotions?

Because this time of year people, (that's us), go through a lot of emotions.  Joy, sadness, anger, depression, fear, etc.   But we are told by the media, by *society* that the only acceptable emotion is joy.  If you are anything but happy, joyful, then there is something wrong with you, you are not normal, take a pill, see a counselor, read a book, "get over yourself".    

My personal belief is that this is WRONG!   What happens when we deny those other emotions?  We stuff them down deeper inside of us with food, drugs, alcohol, spending, and other supposedly more socially acceptable behaviours.

Now I'm not saying it's ok to be angry and go yell at or hit whomever you are angry with, or that medicine isn't helpful at the right time.    

Emotions themselves are not the problem.  It's what we do with them, because of them that becomes the problem.   

All I am saying is that we have emotions.  We need to deal with them, recognize them as real and a part of who we are.    Don't live in the negative emotions, but don't try to stuff them down, hide them away.   Face them, deal with them, fix whatever is causing them.    

Sometimes emotions are the smoke, we turn on the fan & blow away the smoke, without putting out the fire causing the smoke.    IT'S TIME TO PUT OUT THE FIRES, IT'S TIME TO BE REAL AND FIND OUT WHAT'S REALLY CAUSING OUR EMOTIONS.  

It's not the emotions that are the problem.

I'm really tired of people telling me, 'you shouldn't feel sad, afraid, fearful, etc'  or 'why do you feel like that, you have a car, a safe place to live, food & clothing, what reason do you have to feel that way?'  etc etc etc

Thank you, to some really good friends, (Lora & Gloria), who talk me through my 'moments'  and a new acquaintance, (Jim, has pointed me to some info I'm still researching that might explain why I have always felt, thought, been different than what 'normal' people experience.
 
Now, keep in mind.  This is just my opinion.  This is what I believe I have heard Yahuah saying to me, a lot, lately.   

So I guess what I'm trying to say, is let yourself FEEL, experience the emotion and ask Yahuah what He wants you to learn from it, do with it, etc.   

I will no longer stuff my emotions deeper, try to run away from them, pretend they don't exist.  I am real person, created in His image, & He had emotions.  Emotions are a *normal*, real, part of being alive.

OK, enough for now, one more cup of coffee then I get back to cleaning.   oooops, one last emotion, I HATE CLEANING HOUSE!!!  LOL.   

HOW IT TURNED OUT

so, I told you I would tell you how it all turned out at our group discussion tonight.  It's part Bible/Tora study - part current events discussion.  ELOHIM had shown me a few things to share, & I had them written down, sort of, more like a general outline? I left it at home.  so while I was at work taking a break I wrote it down again, on a tablet that I used to take notes at meeting at work.  I left the tablet locked in my drawer at work.  so after we all got there, and we had our usual conversation, Charlie had made a delicious beef stew and pumpkin pie, yum yum, (THANKS BROTHER!!).  I started the discussion by reading to them what I had posted here the other night. I then started adding somethings that I felt HE had previously given me to share.  what was really "funny" and very like HIM, as the conversation continued, using what others were sharing, HE would lead it back to points that I hadn't been able to share yet.  the conversation more less went full circle a couple of times, I learned something, personal and spiritual.  One of the things I learned was that I just need to be myself, be the woman HE created me to be, and let HIM speak through me, I don't always have to have everything all planned out. I was a little worried because I had left both sets of notes behind, read I might forget something, but because I shared from my heart or should I say HE shared through/from my heart, HE didn't let anything be forgotten, it all got shared anyway!
the rest of what was shared? that's a subject for another day.
:-D
its already past my bedtime, again. 
I'll try to share more this weekend.
BE BLESSED,
SHALOM ALECHIYM

I BELIEVE HIM!!

what to say, what to say, what to say?  This Wednesday is my turn to present a topic for discussion at our study group.  And for once in my life, I find myself at a loss for words.  

Do you know what this tells me?  I hope you do.  What I'm thinking, what I'm feeling, deep in my spirit, is that I need to spend time with Yehua, my Saviour, Best Friend, Confidant, Brother.  I need to ask HIM what HE wants to say through me.  

Every day I come closer to the reality that, guess what folks, it's not about me.  It's not about you.  It's ALL ABOUT HIM!!

He created us, He loved us before we were ever even formed in our mother's wombs.  He died for us so that we can spend eternity with HIM!!  

All He desires from us is that we believe in Him & believe Him.   There is a difference you know.  I believe in the reality of the existence of my car, my puppy dog, my children & grand children, the sofa I'm sitting on, my friends, the people I work with, etc etc etc.  I believe that Yehua existed, indeed he always has & always will exist.  I believe that with every fiber of my being.  But I also BELIEVE HIM.  I believe that what He says is true & I can count on Him & what He says 100%.  Do I believe my friends, family & coworkers?  For the most part yes, but I'm aware that sometimes we as human beings only tell each other what we want others to know.  I don't "believe" my sofa, my car, my puppy.....  

But I believe HIM, I believe Yehua, Elohim, Ruach Ha Kodesh.  (Jesus, God, Holy Spirit)  I believe that when He says in Jeremiah 29:11-14 "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you.  and you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for me with all your heart. I will be found by you, says the Lord....", I know that He loves me and He wants me to have Peace & Hope.  I know that he wants me to have a future filled with His Peace, Shalom Peace, nothing missing, nothing broken, nothing out of place.  

So yes there is a difference between believe in someone, & believing them.  I believe Him.  

Maybe that's what I should share?  or maybe I just need to spend more time with Him to find out what He wants to share with us.  

I'll let you know how it turns out. 

In the mean time,

Shalom Alechiym, (Peace to you)

LOVING MY JOURNEY WITH HIM!!

I love the journey I am on, the journey with my Savior & best friend in the entire universe!!  tonight, Friday night in the States, I made an extra effort to honor the Sabbath, Shabbat.  He poured into me,  His vessel, His scriptures & what he wanted me to learn from them  , His SHALOM PEACE, His glorious presence.  it was so amazing!  it's really hard for me to describe, and its late, so I need to get to sleep right away.  a friend called me just after I had finished writing in my journal, I had decided to go ahead and start my supper.  I didn't realize I was still so much under the influence of  His Holy presence, as I tried to talk to her on the phone, I felt giddy, foggy, JOY, UNSPEAKABLE JOY!!  it's very difficult to explain now. I will try again on Monday night, if not before.

what I want to tell you all now is SEEK HIS GLORIOUS PRESENCE!!!!

SHABBAT SHALOM!!

(I did this post from my phone so please forgive if there are any grammar or spelling errors)

OOOOOOO BABY BABY, IT'S COLD OUTSIDE!!

FINALLY got out of bed to get my coffee and breakfast, took kaci outside to do his thing and here is what I saw!

KRAZY DAYZ

super busy at work & having internet issues, unable to post except for from my phone which would take way too long to write what I want to write, stupid cable tv works, but connected internet is apparently offline.  I don't know, they said something like that when I called in the problem. 
should be posting something tonight.

everyone have a very blessed day!!

JUST SMILE :-D

i went to wal-mart tonight, no choice.  I was picking up medicines & the makings for the traditional green-bean casserole.  my sweet bonus daughter (in-law) SAYS my son wants me to make it for Thanksgiving (i think really it might be her who wants it? just kidding sweety, LOL).

ANYWAY...... as I was walking around wal-mart putting things in my basket, I was watching the people, their faces, the way they walked, talked to their companions & children, stood in line.  I'm sorry to say I didn't see one person smiling.  It was heart breaking really.  I was watching all these lonely, sad people walking around buying stuff, some just piling stuff into their shopping carts, some picking very carefully, reading labels, prices & picking the cheapest & those people had VERY few things in their carts.  But regardless if they seemed to have wealth or lacked enough for even the barest necessities, NONE were smiling.  Not even the children.  

Now, keep in mind I had just left work after spending 11 hours on the computer, talking with coaches, agents, bosses, in meetings, doing paperwork, etc etc etc......  I was tired, my feet hurt, I really wanted to just go home, but like I said...  no choice.   Yet, as I looked at all these unhappy people, I had to ask myself, what can I do?  I'm not wealthy, I'm not rich, I live on a budget like everyone else.  So, what could I possibly give that many people to bring even the slightest little bit of joy into their lives?

SMILE

That's all I had to give.  So I did.  I smiled.  I smiled at every possible person I saw, small, tall, girl, boy, man, lady, old, young, 'rich', poor, whoever.  I smiled.  I smiled as I drove my cart down a couple of extra aisles just to smile at some more people. I started small conversations with people at a traffic jam in the produce section, waiting in line to get my medicines, waiting in the next line to pay for my groceries.  In fact, I could have checked out everything at the pharmacy, except for some reason this year I bought fresh instead of canned green beans, which meant I had to go through a regular check out so the green beans could be weighed.  Wouldn't you know it when I finally got to the check out counter, the older couple in front of me wanted to buy a Christmas tree, but the cashier (who I think actually was the ONLY person I saw smiling) didn't know how to check the 'tree' out on her register.  So, we waited.  We waited while she found someone to go out & get a tag or a sign or something so she could finish checking out the couples order & get the line moving again.  The lady of the couple in front of me turned & apologized for the wait, as did the cashier, I just smiled & you guessed it, started another conversation.  Then I turned around & smile at the people waiting behind me.  My feet hurt, my back hurt, I was sooooooo tired.  But I was determined I was going to share as many smiles as I possibly could.  It's quite possible it was the only kindness some of those people might have experienced all day.  

In our day to day world, where we get frustrated because of people not doing their jobs, thus making our jobs more difficult, frustrated with the driver (car or cart) who cuts us off (& then slows down....), frustrated with ourselves for not getting something done, or doing something wrong, or ........,  we tend to forget that the one thing that doesn't cost us any more than a couple of seconds and a few little calories of muscle movement, is a smile.  

With all the stress & strife we have in our lives, personal, job, family, finances, government, etc, the one thing we can do, that NO ONE can take away from us, is SMILE.  It's an international gesture that means the same everywhere.  No language barriers.  Just smile.  

I'm not perfect, & I often have to remind myself to smile, espescially if I'm really focused on something.  I hope I never forget today's lesson.  I hope I never forget to 

JUST SMILE!

 

I was going to do some online courses for work but apparently something on my pc is not compatible with  course web page. I can get in, i can see the selection & select a course, but the courses won't load.  Oh well, maybe that's Elohim's Way of telling me I need to just relax this weekend.  and I am fine with that!!
I'm just not going to worry about it, I have some other things I want to do, crochet, write, read, relax.  I'm tired of feeling like I always have to be doing something, I am trying to learn to relax sometimes, just relax.  that may seem odd to some, but it's a very difficult thing for me to do, for some reason I always feel guilty if I am just relaxing and enjoying myself.  multitasking is good for some things, some times.   but I believe He wants me to learn how to "power down", and rest.  not something I do normally or easily.  Do any of you ever have this problem?  For some reason, I've always equated "relaxing" with "laziness"  Some time, some where, I seem to have picked up this idea that I always have to be doing something "productive" or else I'm being lazy.  

WHY?

After the first 6 days that Elohim *worked* creating everything for us,  He RESTED.  Genesis 2:2-3

After He provided the manna & gave them directions on how to collect it, He commanded them to rest on the following day, on the Sabbath.  Exodus 16:23

Exodus 23:11-12 talks about letting the land rest in the 7th year and reminds us to rest on the 7th day.

Exodus 35:2 speaks again of resting on the 7th day.

Leviticus 16:31, 19:30, 23:3,32 telling us to rest on the Sabbath.  In fact Leviticus 23:32 is very specific, "This will be a Sabbath day of complete rest for you, and on that day you must deny yourselves.  This day of rest will begin at sundown on the ninth day of the month and extend until sundown  on the tenth day"  In this scripture Elohim is instructing His people concerning the day of atonement.  He is so specific that He tells them "All who do not deny themselves that day will be cut off from God's people.  And I will destroy anyone among you who does any work on that day.  You must not do any work at all! This is a permanent law fo ryou and it must be observed from generation to generation wherever you live." (29-31)

Deuteronomy 5:12-15, "observe the Sabbath day by keeping it holy as Yehua, your Elohim, has commanded you.  You have 6 days each week for your ordinary work.  But the 7th day is a Sabbath day of rest dedicated to the Lord your God.  On that day no one in your household may do any work.  this includes you, your sons and daughters, your male and female servants, your oxen and donkeys and other livestock, and any foreigners living among you.  All your male and female servants must rest as you do.  Remember that you were once slaves in Egypt but Yehua, your Elohim brought you out with His strong hand and powerful arm.  That is why Yehua, your Elohim has commanded you to rest on the Sabbath day."

I don't believe He could have made His commandment any clearer.    

As to why it's taken me so long to hear & understand, I don't know.  but I hear & understand now Yehua, my Elohim.  

Regardless of what others think or believe or say or approve or don't approve, I hear & understand.  

Shema, O Israel, Yehua, my Elohim, Yehua is one.  and I shall love Yehua, my Elohim, with all my heart, with all my being, with all my might.  Deuteronomy 6:4-5

one of my favorite life scriptures says it all Psalm 46:10, Be STILL and know that I am Elohim.  I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."  

so for the rest of today, to finish out the Sabbath, I will be STILL and know YOU are my ELOHIM.

SORRY, SWAMPED AT WORK THIS WEEK, BE BACK BY THURSDAY I HOPE!  THIS WEEKEND AT THE LATEST!!

PLEASE, DON'T GO AWAY!! 

Honey

Honey fresh n sweet, then off to dreamland for me!

But this time.....

I'm exhausted again, to the point I can barely keep my eyes open, BUT THIS TIME, it's just physical exhaustion.  there is a peace so deep in my spirit, calm, warm, sweet.  why you ask?  Deuteronomy 6:4-5  "Shema (hear & obey) O Israel, Yehua, your Elohim, Yehua is one! And you shall love Yehua, your Elohim, with all your heart, with all your being, with all your might." 
I have been focusing on these scriptures for a few days now, 'morning, noon & night'.  I have no explanation other than just as He spoke everything into existence, and tells to us we are to speak these words, at the beginning and end of each day and throughout the day, (Deut 6: 6); so we also speak these words into existence into our lives, into our spirit, into our souls, into every part of our being,  changing our spiritual DNA to be more like Him, to saturate ourselves with His presence.
its hard to explain, but o so easy to enjoy this peace, HIS peace.
SHALOM!!

FUN!!! I NEED TO HAVE SOME FUN IN MY LIFE

WELL, I SURVIVED, BARELY, BUT I SURVIVED....

And here it is, a half hour after my bed time.  I spent the last hour or so working on my story blog.  Why did I choose to write on my story blog instead of here you ask?  (or even if you don't ask?  LOL) 

FUN!!!  I NEED TO HAVE SOME FUN IN MY LIFE.   Even if no one else ever reads my story, it's fun for me, relaxing, and get's me out of my self, so to speak.  So even though I haven't written here for 2 weeks or so, at least not seriously.  This is all I have for tonight.  I have to get to sleep so I can get to work freakishly early tomorrow morning.  Please, if you haven't already, take a look at my story and I hope you enjoy it.  LOST CHID FOUND AGAIN.   

OTHERWISE, I'LL BE BACK, TOMORROW, I HOPE! :)

 

"I AM NOT HERE TO FIGHT, I AM HERE TO WIN!"

So much going on inside my brain, in my spirit......

I'm not sure I even know where to begin.   The last 2 weeks have been *super stressful* to say the least.  But this weekend was **SUPER SUPERNATURALLY STRESS RELIEVING!!**  what did I do?  nothing much that would appear out of the normal.  I slept, I cleaned house, but most importantly, I spent time with my grandchildren!!  I heard Eloheim's voice speak to me so many times this weekend.  Actually, He never stopped speaking, I was just so busy & so stressed, it was difficult for me to hear Him.  

But thanks to our study on Wednesday & listening to His voice, & even what was shared in *church* this morning & then what my friend shared with me over iced tea this afternoon.   

Soooooo, back to the subject of *strength*.  

Our *little* study group is a special treasure, to me, & to Yahweh.  and trust me, though we might be *little* in number, there is NOTHING LITTLE about us!  I find strength in our studies, I find strength in our fellowship.
I also find strength in Yahweh's words to me.  Trust Me, lean on Me, listen to Me, spend time with Me.  Study My word, no really, STUDY MY WORD, in depth and as you have never studied before!  

There was much I heard over the last 2 weeks, but 2 things stuck with me the most, one was that last part, "Study My word, no really, STUDY MY WORD, in depth and as you have never studied before"!  it coincided with what we studied Wednesday evening about the "Paleo-Hebrew" alphabet.  I'm so excited to get started.  the scriptures that were shared from Daniel (hiding the scriptures) & John (revealing the scriptures) & the parable about the woman who lost 1 coin, spoke volumes to my spirit.  I know, I need to share more information, and I will, just not tonight.  

The other thing that stuck with me was what I heard at church this morning:  "I AM NOT HERE TO FIGHT, I AM HERE TO WIN!!"  


I REPEAT, 
"I AM NOT HERE TO FIGHT, I AM HERE TO WIN!"

Yeshua did not come to earth to fight,
HE CAME TO WIN!  

The other morning, getting ready for work, I found myself in tears, exhaustion had finally taken it's ugly final blow.  As I called out to Eloheim, words of pain, exhaustion on every level, and yes, maybe even a few words of fear (the 'what if' kind);  I at once felt His presence, His peace, His strength & His words, "I already hold your victory in My hand, just REST in Me & watch it happen!!"   I believe those words were confirmed this morning at church, but since that very moment I have felt His peace, His SHALOM PEACE (nothing missing, nothing broken, nothing out of place), abiding within me.  It carried me through work that day, and kept building stronger within me as I enjoyed my weekend.  

I debated whether to share this with anyone, it's so very difficult for me to admit weakness, to anyone; but then more than once, in different ways, I heard Him say, my dreams, the work He is doing in me, is not to be kept to myself, but is to be shared. Shared, if for no other reason than to solidify it in my mind, but also, hopefully, it will strength someone else reading this.  Someone who is finding they are feeling stressed to the maximum & exhausted beyond definition.  

So, it's now 9pm & time for me to put this away for the evening.  Please, be blessed & know you are not alone.  WE are not alone.

Oy Vey!!!!!!

I hope I spelled that right?  I've been putting in 10, 12, and even a couple 14 hour days at work.  I still have a lot I would like to share with everyone, everyone being whoever happens to read this, LOL.  I just got home from a nine hour day at work.  I am so far past exhausted, I can't see straight, seriously!  I hope I can remember what I want to share by the time this weekend gets here.  thank you for your patience! Be blessed y'all !!
SHALOM!!

later that same day.....

I guess I can't count either, it was a 12 hour day, bbbblllllaaaaaacccchhhh

Billy Graham, the alarm for the second coming of the Messiah, my thoughts on this

agreed, we are entering the end times.  I believe it may get much much much worse before Yeshua returns again.  would I prefer Messiah return quickly, of course!  but we must prepare for and warn others of the possibility of some very dark days approaching. 
as the days darken, I pray that as we go closer to Him, HIS light will shine brighter in and through us!!

http://endtimeheadlines.wordpress.com/2013/10/20/billy-graham-sounds-alarm-for-2nd-coming/

My apologies

I'm really sorry I don't have a lot have time to write tonight, last week was extremely busy at work, and this weekend I was playing catch up with housekeeping and time with Eloheim!!!  I have much in my spirit to share, but no time left for this evening, not the kind of time I need to really sort out my thoughts and say things the way He wants me to say them.  I will post as soon as possible, hopefully tomorrow night or Tuesday night.  but no promises.  My Abba has given me so much to dwell on!!  thank you Charlie and Lora for allowing me to assist with putting together your tabernacle and sharing in the blessing!

SHALOM TO ALL!!!

His Strength, not mine!

Judges 16:17
Finally, Samson shared his secret with her "My hair has never been cut," he confessed, "for I was dedicated to God as a Nazirite from birth. If my head were shaved, my strength would leave me, and I would become as weak as anyone else."

Like Samson, I have been trying to find my own strength, not necessarily from my hair, hahaha, but trying to find my strength from my own self, out of who I am on my own.  

Guess what, it didn't work for Samson, and it hasn't worked for me either.  

For weeks, more likely months, I found myself coming home from work, worn out, exhausted, done.   I used my tiredness as an excuse to sit and do nothing but the absolute minimum until it was time for bed.  Then in the morning I'd get up, get ready for work, still tired & using my rush & tiredness has more excuses to do only the minimum required.  The most important thing I was missing, and I knew it, was my time with God.  I used to spend a lot of time with God, coffee & my journal & Bible in the early morning.  Reading more of His word, or a study of His word in the evening, & many times of prayer during the day.  

But then my life changed, suddenly & drastically.  I was on my own again, physically & financially, after 15 years of marriage.  My emotions were more of relief that it was finally done.  But I found myself without the same luxury  of time.  Still, living on the lakes edge, I found myself with time for walks and talks with God, still journalling, still spending time with Him.  While there were moments of anger & loneliness & confusion.  I would pray & spend time with my Abba & come out on the other side more sure.  I didn't lose my strength.

I don't know where or when it happened, but somewhere along the way, since after I moved from the lake and since after Pastor's Tom & Mary retired, I stopped spending so much time with Abba.  

Then one day recently I realized I was tired of being tired all the time.  At first I only just recognized that fact, I was tired of being tired all the time.  But I did nothing about it.  I just continued on.  I started recognizing that I was tired of more things, tired of living from penny to penny, tired of living from one emotion to the next, tired of living on the edge, waiting for someone else to tell me what else I'd done wrong, tired of feeling alone, tired of not having enough time, enough energy to do anything but just work & come home & go to sleep, & go to work, & come home & go to sleep & go to work.....  I can't & I don't even want to say all the different things I was tired of.  Suffice  it to say, I'm tired.

But, I recognize now that I'm in need of a strength that I can't find on my own.  I tried.  It didn't work.  I tried to find a strength on my own.    One day it just occurred to me, not suddenly like being hit like a truck or anything, it just kind of popped into my head, (thank You Holy Spirit),  I was looking for strength in the wrong place.  I had stopped spending time with Abba, I had stopped seeking Him & I lost my strength.  Oh, I occasionally read a scripture or two.  I went to church on a fairly regular basis.   I wrote in my journal during church and sometimes just because.  I watched Joseph Prince & Joel Osteen & Jesse Duplantis on tv,  but it wasn't the same.  I had no strength & I wasn't really looking for it.  I wasn't really trying.  I just knew I was tired, tired, tired, tired, tired, and using tired as an excuse to not do anything about it, including asking God for help.

But that one moment came more and more often, a reminder of a relationship i once shared with Abba.  A moment here and there, more and more often, that He missed our time together more than I did.  Reminders that I was tired because I wasn't looking for strength, I wasn't  seeking Him.  

I finally decided something had to change, I wasn't sure exactly what, but something had to change.  I changed to a different church, I'd gone to see Jesse Duplantis and saw some folks from the church I'd been going to and the church where Pastors Tom & Mary had taught.  They were all going to the same church who was hosting Mr Duplantis.  So, I started going to that church, & I started going more often.  I started seeking God's wisdom.  I started hearing His voice again.  I understand He has been here all along, but what I didn't understand is that using my tiredness as an excuse to just sit and do nothing & not even talk to God or seek Him was self-defeating.  what I knew somewhere deep inside but was trying to ignore for whatever reason, was that the more time I would spend with God, the more strength I would have.  So as I've started seeking scriptures that speak of strength, they affirm what I was hearing from God.  It's His presence, His joy, His Peace that will help me to find His strength.  I am weak, but He is strong.

Before you judge me to quickly, please understand, I never stopped loving Him, trusting Him.  He never stopped providing His Grace & Favour.  I know of many times, all I had to do was ask & He provided.  It's just that I wasn't asking the right question when it came to strength.  And now, as I again seek Him, His Wisdom, His Peace, His Joy, His strength, His promises, I find myself not as tired any more.  It may take some time to get back to where I was, but I know that I will not only get back to where I was, but that He, my Abba, will get me to an even better place, He has more and better planned for me.  And He needs me strong to follow Him more closely.  It's amazing, He is also providing the strength I need to follow Him.   

As we deal daily with the world's chaos, both nationally and personally, we will all need HIS strength.  Below is a short list of scriptures on strength.  By no means is it a complete list.  I encourage you to seek out what you need from His word.  As I am.  

(I apologize if I was 'babbling' a wee bit, it's late and I should have been in bed at least an hour ago, or more, but I had pc issues & was determined to post this!)



Exodus 15:2
The Lord is my strength and my song;  He has given me victory.  this is my God, and I will praise him-my father's God, and I will exalt him!  

Deuteronomy 9:29  But they are Your people and Your special possession, who You brought out of Egypt by Your great strength and powerful arm.

1Chronicles 16:11  Search for the Lord and for his strength; continually seek Him.

Job 9:35  Then I could speak to Him without fear, but I cannot do that in my own strength.

Psalms 18:1
I love You, Lord; You are my strength.

Psalms 18:29
In Your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall. 

Psalms 18:32
God arms me with strength, and He makes my way perfect.  


Psalms 29:11
The Lord gives His people strength the Lord blesses them with peace.


Deuteronomy 6:5
And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and all your strength.




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
please know, you, my readers, are always welcomed & encouraged to please leave helpful hints, questions, etc. thanks!

God is speaking!

WONDERFUL BIBLE STUDY TONIGHT!   

My friends & I met at Hastings HardBack Cafe this evening.  VERY interesting conversation about the current state of the nation, how world & national events relate to spiritual current & coming events.  We also discussed & found out we've all been noticing different atmospheric changes, on a spiritual level.  

I can't get into all right now, time for some sleep, but let's suffice it to say, God is moving, God is speaking, the most important thing we need to do is LISTEN!!!

THANK YOU JUAN, LORA & STACI FOR YOUR AWESOME INPUT IN A GREAT STUDY TIME!!!  

:-D

   

What I saw horrified me...................

Just a quick diversion from talking about *strength*.  Mostly because I need to get busy doing dishes & because I haven't put everything together yet about what & how I want to present my notes on *strength*.  

No, tonight I want to talk about one thing & one thing only.  WHAT IS WRONG WITH PARENTS TODAY????

I was at wally world this afternoon to pick up just a few items and a prescription.   What I saw horrified me, made me want to 'chuck', made me want to grab these parents & shake them!  

It was a young couple, late 20's, early 30's, with their probably 6 year old daughter, 3 or 4 year old boy & a baby.  Before you tell me to mind my own business.  I WAS minding my own business!  But when you dress your little boy like a little gangster & your 6 year old daughter is dressed to make $200 a night on the strip, it's a little difficult NOT to notice!!!   

So when I say "Oh My God!"  I'm not using Abba's name in vain, I truly mean "Oh My God, what is wrong with these people?"  What can they possibly be thinking to dress their children like that?  Both the mother & father were dressed more or less casual.  t-shirt & jeans for both, her's was maybe a little tighter than what I would call a natural fit, but oh well, she's a grown woman & can make her own decisions on how she wants other men looking at her.  Her daughter was no where near old enough to decide for herself that it was ok for her to be gawked at like a piece of meat!  

I know the answer before I ask it; The world is so accustomed to walking in the darkness they don't even see they are walking into a trap, a pit, a gigantic ocean of lies, deceit, hatred, loathing, etc, & the enemy wants to drown them in it.  They don't even understand they are walking in darkness and there is a Light, who wants nothing more than to save them & love them & dispel the darkness that is smothering them.  

But I still have to ask the question, "Oh My God, what is wrong with these people, how can they be so blind!"  

My heart, my spirit cries at the darkness that surrounds people.  It fills their spirits with a blackness that deafens them to the Love & Peace & Light that Abba wants to fill them with!!  

Please forgive me if I seem judgemental, I don't mean to be, I promise.  But that little girl, & the poor little boy who seems to have his parents thrusting him to the image of how cool it is to be a 'gangster',  & who knows what will become of the baby.   I can't help but want to shake those parents, hug those little babies (even @ 6 that little girl is still a baby!) & pray for all of them.

You know I thought I might feel better, if I voiced my thoughts out loud.  I don't.   In fact, if anything, I feel worse, because I realize there is absolutely nothing I can do except pray for those precious babies to be protected, for the parents to WAKE UP,  & thank God, literally, that my children do not allow my grandchildren to dress & act like that.  Thank you God that my children do their best to teach their children how to be modest & to believe in God & to do what's right, not just what's easy.      

Ok, time to do dishes, but I'm still bothered, still praying.  thanks for letting me "vent".


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

please know, you, my readers, are always welcomed & encouraged to please leave helpful hints, questions, etc.
thanks!